So Many Moons
by Beth Pryor
Summary: This is an expanded take on the scene between Annie and Auggie as they board the plane to Hong Kong at the end of episode 4.14. Follows canon, Annie/Auggie, spoilers for up to this episode. Expanded from a one-shot. Now COMPLETE.
1. Chapter 1

**Title: So Many Moons**

**Author:** Beth Pryor

**Rating:** K+

**Summary:** An expanded take on the scene between Annie and Auggie as they board the plane to Hong Kong at the end of 4.14. Canon, Annie/Auggie, spoilers for up to this episode. Likely a one-shot. Unless I feel inspired.

**Disclaimer:** Covert Affairs and its characters belong to the USA Network.

**A/N:** I've been woefully behind in catching up on this season and still haven't seen the end yet, so I also haven't been reading your work. I hope this hasn't been done a million times, or if it has, that this is a little bit of a different take.

The title is taken from "My My Love" by Joshua Radin, which served as one of my inspirations along with "Morning Song" by The Avett Brothers.

* * *

**So Many Moons**

Auggie is standing in the cabin as Annie boards the plane. "Hi." He's been waiting.

She moves past him. "Hi." There should be more to say, but brief and impersonal seems easier. Only, they aren't brief and impersonal, not even from day one. It's weird, and they both know it.

"Joan thought you could use a Tech out there," he tries. He feels the need to explain his presence on her mission.

She knows what he's doing, but he really doesn't have to. It's _their_ mission – has been all along. "She told me," she says, thankful that Joan has done just that. She isn't sure how she might have reacted if she hadn't been expecting him.

"When she told you, you, um…" His voice sounds so unsure again, like the night before. She almost forgets that he's been on his own for the past few months. He doesn't know how hard she's been working to get back to him. Does he?

She tries to reassure him, although her words sounds a little tinny, almost constricted when they leave her mouth. "I know you've always got my back." She hopes they only sound that way to her because she knows her own doubts. She wants him to believe in her, believe in them. If there ever can be a "them" again.

"I do." There is more conviction in his voice, in his face, than anything since she told him about Helen. There's the slightest hint of a smile, too. She allows herself just a whisper of the good kind of hope.

But there is Helen. Actually, there isn't anymore, but they still can't seem to get away from Auggie's dead, then not dead, now truly dead wife. She reaches into her pocket "I, uh, took this the other night." She takes his hand and places the necklace in it. "I'm not entirely sure why." _What is it with me and the jewelry he buys for other women_, she thinks as their hands touch.

The chain slips through his fingers like liquid silver through a sieve. He pauses, like he doesn't know what to say again. "Thank you." He sits. "I was scared I'd lost you."

She's not sure that's it at all, but she goes along with him for now. "You know when I was scared?" she asks him. Because she still is scared. But even more, she is resolved to end this. She assumes he understands, and that's why he's here. In case she goes down in a blaze of glory. Or worse.

His brow furrows slightly. "When?"

"When I knocked on your door and you asked who it was. And I didn't know the answer."

He wants to tell her that she's the same person she was before Germany and that things will go back to normal as soon as they get back home, but he doesn't. He can't say anything because he can't quite convince himself that it might be true. He doesn't see how things can possibly be the same when they're both so different now, when everything is so different now. But he doesn't have to say anything.

Calder joins them, and the moment is lost. "We all good?" He asks, and the other two realize this question is rhetorical. There is no need to answer, but no. They are not.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Calder keeps talking, and she forgets to listen. Her thoughts drift – about 5,000 miles in the opposite direction of where they're flying now. She looks up. Auggie is nodding. Good. He knows what's going on. The other two stand and wait for her to join them. "I'm sorry," she says. "I must have zoned out."

"Get some sleep," Calder advises. "We'll reconvene after refueling in Hawaii." He walks toward the back of the plane and what Annie assumes are berths.

Auggie reaches for her. "Are you okay?"

She takes his hand and stands. "Yeah. Just tired or jetlagged or something." Her free hand reaches to her aching head and finds the trail of dried blood in her hair. She keeps forgetting about that, which probably isn't a good sign. "Can I shower?" she asks, not really to him, but just a general question.

"Well, this isn't an Emirates Airbus, but I'm sure we can find somewhere for you to clean up. Want to explore a little?" Her hand is in his, but he finds her elbow. She forgets how much touching is involved when interacting with a person who is blind. She forgets how much she enjoys his touch on her arm as the electricity it produces shoots across her skin. She knows she went away, but that didn't stop her from wanting him. Always. Now. But she's not as sure about whether he wants _her_ anymore.

They head off in Calder's direction. There is another small room with a bed and a lavatory in the back of the cabin. She drops Auggie and their bags by the little bed space before moving on to explore the bathroom. She finds a handheld shower head that appears to screw into the faucet. She's prepared to shower over the toilet before she finds a drain on the floor beside it. She realizes this could get very wet and messy. Finally, she retreats to where she left Auggie and finds him half sitting, half crouching on the bed, head in his hands.

"What happened?" she asks as she approaches.

"I tried to look around a little and ran right into a bulkhead. I think I'm bleeding," he reveals, opening his hands just enough for her to see the red.

She helps him up, being sure to duck his head as he stands, and leads him somewhat clumsily to the lavatory where he plops down on the toilet seat. She leans over him to examine the cut. They've assumed this position before, just not in such close quarters. She wets a rag and hands it to him. He wipes his face as she takes a look where the skin is split just below his hairline.

"Can you glue it?" He's hit his head enough times by now to tell what needs to be closed and what will be fine on its own.

She dabs the blood. "Yeah. It's straight." She's nearly straddling his lap now, so she stands. "Keep pressure on that. I'll find a first aid kid." Hopefully one that contains epinephrine and skin glue. If not, surely she can find Krazy Glue somewhere on this plane.

"There's one in my bag," he tells her, and she starts off back down the little hall. After a few seconds of rummaging, she finds the neatly wrapped kit in one of the outer pockets.

"I got it," she smiles as she rejoins him in the bathroom. As she opens the kit, she sees that he's wisely packed not only general first aid supplies, but he has added a few things for a situation just like this. She draws up about 1 cc of the epinephrine with a syringe and squirts it into a 4x4 gauze. He takes the bandage from her and uses it to stop the bleeding as she pulls out the Dermabond for the repair. In just over a minute, he's as good as new, and she's packing up the kit.

As she turns away, his hand reaches for her, catching in her longer, darker hair. She winces. "Oh, sorry." He pulls back his hand, finding something sticky, gritty and metallic on his fingers. "Are you bleeding, too?" he asks.

Her hand replaces his against the side of her head. Nothing fresh, only the dried blood remains. "No. But I was. That's why I wanted to shower."

"Are you okay?" his eyes grow wide as he asks.

"Let's just say that you weren't the only one concussed today."

"Annie." He scolds her softly as he stands, his hand finding her waist, moving close to her.

She pulls back from his touch enough for him to notice. "It's fine. Nothing a little soap and water won't fix." She turns away from him. "Do you want to go back in the little bedroom or do you want to sleep in the main cabin? The seats fold into real beds."

"Where are you going to be?" he asks.

"I'm going to clean up and then find an open spot to sleep, at least until we get to Hawaii." She turns back to him. "You pick first, and I'll take whatever's left. Take the bathroom first, too, if you need. It will be a wet mess after I'm done with it."

"Oh, okay, I just thought that maybe…" he pauses. "Never mind," he finally finishes his thought with that. "I'll take the cabin, if you wouldn't mind seeing to the bed configuration while I'm in here?"

"No problem." She points out the fixtures in the bathroom, differentiating soap from lotion and pulls his toothbrush and toothpaste from his pack before she leaves him.

"Annie?" he calls into the hall, as she walks away.

She stops, turns. "Yeah?"

"We'll make it through this." His brow is furrowed again with confusion and his expression is not one that inspires confidence.

She immediately picks up on the contradiction of his words and expression. "Will we?" She asks, assuming they even make it home. "Because even though I want that to be true, I'm not so sure. And I'm not the one who slept with someone else."

"Really?" he pleads. "But before, with Simon and Parker…"

Her hand on his arm stops him. He notices that she's barely touched him since Helen's apartment. "We weren't together then, Auggie."

He nods. "I know, but we should have been."

Her finger traces his hairline, just around where the glue is still hardening. "I know I was gone for a long time."

"That's not your fault," he interrupts. He knows it's his.

She sighs. "But it was my choice."

He shakes his head, moving closer to her if that's even possible in the tiny bathroom. His hands find her arm and then her waist again. "We both knew what we were getting into with this decision."

She leans her body and her head against his. "We thought we did, Auggie. But maybe it's been too much for too long."

"Don't say that," he whispers as his lips brush hers.

She accepts his kiss, but whispers in return. "What if it's the truth?"

He doesn't have an answer for that.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: This is the end for this little one. I've appreciated you lovely reviews as well as the chance to explore this part of the story a little more. I hope you enjoy the finale.

* * *

Chapter 3

She sleeps for what feels like a minute for the first time in what feels like a week before Auggie's knock wakes her.

"Annie?" He pauses, allowing her to wake. "You have to come and sit in a seat for landing."

She squints against the darkness to focus on his shadowed figure as the light streams in behind him. "Hawaii already?" That seems inordinately fast.

He shakes his head. "No. Southern California."

She swings her legs over the edge of the cot. "What? Why?"

He smiles. "You really were out of it before, weren't you?"

"Uh, yeah. What all did I miss?" she asks as she pulls her still damp hair in to a ponytail.

"Calder droned on for about twenty minutes about how we would probably make it with one refueling stop, but he didn't want us miscalculating and falling short over the Pacific. You didn't get any of that?"

"I guess not," she chuckles as she reaches for her sweater. "Are we landing at LAX?"

"No. Long Beach."

She crinkles her nose when he says that. "Are we actually on a mission to find Warren G?"

Auggie can't help but laugh. "I'm going to pretend that I don't know what you're talking about."

"Except you do remember that I have your iTunes password, right?" she goads.

"I changed it last week," he counters. "Too many freeloaders with bad taste in music."

She grins. "Did you also delete _your_ 90's hip hop channel?"

Calder interrupts before he can answer. "Today, Walker. We'd like to keep this ship on schedule."

Annie's on her feet now, moving toward the main cabin. Her hand brushes Auggie's as she brushes by him, their own version of a shared smile. "Sure, sure, Calder. Show me to a seatbelt."

She takes her seat beside Auggie and buckles herself in. They're on the ground in just a few minutes. Calder stands to meet the ground crew. He also gets a real-time update from Joan, even though it's only very early morning in DC. The update is that there is no update. Annie grabs a couple of drinks from the galley, handing one to Auggie as she sinks back into the seat beside him again.

"I guess there's no need to try to go back to bed just yet, as I'm guessing we'll have to be belted in to take off," she explains as she taps distractedly on the armrest between them.

"Annie," he starts.

"Not now, Auggie," she pleads.

He notices that she's using his name a lot in place of the other things they normally call each other. Her favorite name for him is "Love." At least, he hopes it still is.

He nods but pushes on. "I know you don't want to do this now, but we're not going to have a chance once we get there." He pauses and turns toward her. "And if something happens to you, and I haven't at least tried to fix this…" He runs a hand through his hair and then down across his face. He can't even bring himself to imagine life without her, without even the possibility of her.

She reaches across and quiets his hands, quiets him. "Okay, but not right now. Not until we take off again and we can be alone." She knows Calder is likely to return at any moment.

As if on cue, Calder strolls back into the cabin. He indicates that everything is in order for their next leg of the journey.

"You think maybe they'd spring for the G650 for the next trans-Pacific flight and eliminate all this," Annie muses.

Calder's narrow-eyed gaze bores into her. "This was the best I could do for an off-book mission in China with only a few hours to plan."

"Relax, Calder," Auggie says. "We always fly coach. Or cargo hold."

"And we'll be there in plenty of time if our stops don't take any longer than that," Annie assures. She knows they are on a potentially tight schedule.

Calder sits back in his seat for takeoff but doesn't really answer them. Once the "all-clear" is given, he heads back to his bunk with little more than a grunt. Auggie realizes they're going to have to smooth that over, too.

Annie is nearly asleep in her own seat by this time. Auggie listens as her breathing alternates between the deep rhythmic respirations of slumber and shorter, shallow ones.

"Annie?" he touches her hand during one of the more awake breaths. "Do you want to go back to the bed?"

She yawns and stretches. "No. You can take it if you want."

"That's not why I'm asking." He hears her unbuckle her seatbelt and imagines her tucking her feet up under her as she reclines the seat. "I was hoping maybe we could find some time to talk."

"Auggie."

"I'm serious." He unbuckles his own belt and moves a little closer to her. "I need you to at least hear me out, and then I'm done. I promise."

She knows how tenacious he can be, and she needs his head clear when they land. Her ability to get back on the plane depends on it. "Okay," she finally concedes. "Talk."

"That's not exactly what I meant."

"Well," she asks, "What did you mean?"

He sighs, not believing that his first meaningful personal conversation with her in so many months is this one. "I meant I wanted to tell you how sorry I am that I did what I did and that it was with Helen." He waits for her to give him something. There is only silence. He keeps going. "I know that's not enough, but I don't know where else to start." He wishes she'd say or do anything. Finally, he hears her adjust her position in the seat and realizes he's going to have to push. "Annie, please say something."

"There's so much happening, Auggie. I don't have the ability or time right now to process this or what it means for us." She raises the armrest between them and moves over onto his seat with him. "I love you. I do accept your apology, but I just don't know about any more than that."

He accepts her closeness and wraps his arms around her. This feels right. Always has. He prays they will move past this. "All I'm asking is for another chance. If we have the chance." The uncertainty of the immediate future looms ahead of them. This may be all the time they have.

"I thought you'd given up on me," she whispers to his chest.

His wraps his arms even more tightly around her. "Oh, Sweetheart. No. I, I never. I would never…" he stammers.

She reaches up for him, finding his face bending toward hers. "That's what I really needed to hear," she breathes. Her mouth opens just slightly as they find each other again. They both understand the gravity of their upcoming mission and the possibility that they may not make it back. She never wants him to let go. He doesn't know if he can.

FIN


End file.
